Standing and warfare

I was accused the other day of standing to look good to others. I don’t really get that as I look less in the eyes of my spouse and almost anyone outside of my standing groups thinks I’m nuts that even know a part of the situation. I don’t spread what happened and I don’t put down my spouse. I suggest to all standers to refrain from slandering in any way even when things are true your spouse. It isn’t helpful and doesn’t build anyone up.

What it did make me do is evaluate why I stand and for what purpose. I know that it started as a stand for our marriage to be restored and that is still a part of it but it is a much smaller and art now than before. I equate standing with warfare now because Satan wants nothing more than your spouse and if he can do it you as well in hell. He wants you removed from the grace and mercy of God.

A stand is to stand in the gap and fight for the soul of your spouse. It is to be faithful to the word of God and it is for the Glory of God. For the Lord wants marriages to last, they represent His love and relationship with the Church and His people. We see this in the entire book of Hosea. A man, a prophet of God, told to marry a prostitute which he does being faithful to God. We see that she does not even come close to being a faithful spouse and even goes back to being a prostitute. The one thing that Hosea did not do is kill her or divorce her. No he stayed faithful to her because Gods people are like Hosea’s wife, unfaithful and turning on the Lord. God was and is faithful He doesn’t cast us off when we screw up He reaches out and makes a way for us to come home.

That is what we fight for for our spouses, our husbands or wives to come back to the Lord and to be healed of all the guilt and shame that consume them. Be gentle with your spouse, be loving and keep praying.


To Stand

I was listening to some music when the song Stand by newsboys came on and it made me think. I say I am standing for my marriage, and I am, but what does that actually mean? Am I standing because I want the self gratification of having my wife back home? Or am I standing for Gods glory? I like one of the lines am I standing for my savior or standing for my flesh. That is something we have to answer. Their is a truth revealed in Gods word that gives us direction. We claim to stand on Gods promises but do we actually trust Him?

I have seen standers give up, become discouraged because their marriages aren’t restored in their own timing. Now are they standing for the Glory of God or for themselves? Yes it feels better if your spouse is home, yes it is easier not as hard. We are having our faith tested and refined, when another person comes along that we find attractive and you know that you can take to bed, do you? It could be that you haven’t felt another human being touch you for years because you haven’t seen your spouse. What do you do? Do you do what feels good and find companionship outside of your marriage? Or do you stand on the truth in Gods word that said no matter the situation that is adultery and wrong and through the hardest times you have God is faithful and with you?

This in my opinion is a point that we must focus on and decide if we are going to actually stand at the foot of the cross or stand for ourselves and what we want.


Ok so first off I hope the picture is visible. If not it says, A man that can give you everything but the love of Christ can give you nothing at all.

I like this and really wanted to focus on standers. This should be first and foremost in our minds, unconditional love only comes from God. We have to be faithful to the truth of Gods word and actually live a faith filled life. We don’t just say hey we are Christians and live like the world no. We should show by our actions that we follow Christ. You see it is God who changes hearts, not us. It is God who draws the lost to Himself. So let’s offer our spouses the greatest gift we can and that is Jesus Christ alive in us. Let them see Him when they look at us and not the world.


So we are at the doorstep of Christmas, Christmas Eve and many of us don’t have our families here because of whatever reason. It hurts and isn’t fun. We don’t bother to buy presents. Why would we when alone?

The good thing here is that Christmas isn’t about stuff. It isn’t about family either though our families are important. No what Christmas is is God sending His son as a human being so that He could be crucified and die on our behalf.

You see even though we spend our Christmas without our families any of those spouses or children or whoever that is lost spend it without Jesus their savior. They are far more alone than we are who have God truly in our lives. So let us pray for our prodigals and remember that we have the greatest gift ever given. Forgiveness and being a child of God.


I have seen some talk of the love of my life from people in some deep sin.

Scripture tells us adultery is a sin God hates. In this case we know for sure that the love of your life is in fact your spouse and not the counterfeit Satan has sent to lead astray and destroy your marriage.

One thing never to forget standers is that the only thing Satan wants is to steal, kill and destroy your wayward spouse and your marriage. So keep praying for them, keep loving unconditionally.

A reminder

We just finished thanksgiving and are heading into the Christmas season and I know that that can be a very hard time for standers separated from their families for whatever reason.

I know that it looks like our prodigals don’t care at all about what pain they are causing as they go about their lives leaving you abandoned.

What I was reminded of was that Jesus was known as the man of sorrows. Part of that I believe is the adultery of His people. Remember all God wants is a relationship with His people, an intimate relationship. He calls idolatry adultery by placing other gods before Him. Some of us standing know the pain of our spouses living with other people, doing whatever they want unless it is the right and Godly thing to do.

A good book of the Bible for this is Hosea. He was one of Gods prophets asked to marry Gomer a prostitute. Hosea did and had to deal with his wife cheating and eventually abandoning him to be a prostitute again. Hosea never gave up on her and accepted the shame and did what was needed and brought her back home. Now the whole book is also about how God is going to restore Israel to Himself. A whole people prostituting themselves out and our God feels. He is hurt by the rejection of His people. What is His response? To send His son Jesus to die for us that we may be reconciled. He didn’t leave say it isn’t fair, it hurts too much. No He loved us to the point of giving His life for us.


Ok so I know that older post I have made talk about this and that is fine. It is worth repeating and I see the worlds idea of forgiveness popping up all the time.

Not willing to trust someone again means that you haven’t actually forgiven them. You are still holding onto what they did. You have to let it go, leave it in the past and not bring it up again. By not trusting again you keep whatever was done in the present at all times. That is the complete opposite of being forgiving.

I’m really glad that God who gave His life that I may live forgave me and trusted me after the fact. He made us His children and we as people have the gall to say don’t trust again? It doesn’t mean walk in blindly, I know that people lie, cheat, betray we still must forgive and let that go. We must continue doing that because that is what God has called us to do.

A Christian perspective

It has been a while since I last posted and the main reason behind that is I was focusing on work and my church. It hasn’t lessened my stand at all it’s just at a holding pattern right now and letting the Lord do His work.

That is actually why I wanted to make a comment on this saying. While I get where people are coming from with this mind set, it isn’t a Christian mindset. You see as Christians we are supposed to be Christ like that is what being a follower of Christ is all about. He didn’t cut people out because they disrespected Him. No what He did was die so that they wouldn’t have to. He gave His life for people that hated Him, for people who actually killed Him, for those who laughed and mocked Him. He made room for all of them in His life because He loved each and every one of us.

I just ask that if you are Christian to stop thinking like the world and make a place in your life for the lost and the broken. Pray for them, forgive them and never stop loving them.

God bless all prodigals and standers.


I know that it has been a while since I have posted. Just been resting and letting the Lord work. No changes I can see on my end but that does not mean that the Lord is not at work.

What I wanted to comment on was a picture going around some of my groups

So this is goi g around to encourage people but what it is saying is wrong. God isn’t the author of a cheating spouse or any other sin or temptation we are goi g through. He will and does use the bad to turn it to good but He is not the cause of the bad. We must be truly careful in claiming God put us in such and such situation that can lead to grumbling and an inability to trust in His goodness if we believe He is the reason we are goi g through seasons of hardship.

So while it is true we only need God we cannot place blame on Him for our circumstances.